My hubby and I were out on the lake a week or so ago and snapped this picture of a cedar tree that has bent itself way off the shore to grow. It’s probably been hit by lightning in the past, refused to die, and began growing in another direction, toward new light and water and freedom. It may be an unusual shape for a cedar tree, but it’s fully alive, fully a part of the forest around it.
As we were drifting away from “seeking cedar” as we called it, I started thinking about how much we have to be willing to grow, in our own unique way, to create the fully alive life and work we crave. The work I do with others about their business often becomes about their personal life, too. Why? Because we can’t develop into the entrepreneurs we want to be without changing those parts of ourselves that hold us to the normal, everyday life. As solo business owners we have to be adaptable, just like this “seeking cedar” tree. We have to reach for the nutrients we need even if it means growing away from the shore that has supported us, or looking a little different than others who work for themselves. In fact, the more we know ourselves, the more we know our uniqueness, which is, after all, what others buy from us. Just like this tree, we have to stand out to be noticed. If we insist on blending in, we make it much more difficult for people to find us and want our services.
Here’s a quick exercise you can try that will help you understand how much you are willing to stretch to build your business. Get into a quiet spot for about 15 minutes with a pad and pencil (or your laptop if you consider that a thing of the past, LOL). Ask yourself:
- What two things stop me from being all I truly can be in my life and my work?
- Am I the one stopping myself from removing these two things, or is it someone else?
- Am I willing to stretch myself to change or remove these two things?
- What will I gain by stretching in this way?
- What’s the worst thing that might happen? And what happens after the worst thing has happened?
- What’s the best thing that might happen? And what comes after that?
You can use these questions whenever you are scared of an opportunity that presents itself in your business. They will help you to see what you should do, what actions or thoughts will serve you the most in building your business. Just don’t be surprised when you realize that stretching to be the entrepreneur you can be also stretches your personal life. It’s a hand-in-glove proposition – when you stretch one, you stretch the other. You can die in place when you’ve been pushed or shoved, or you can become a seeking cedar and stretch into a brand new space.
Kristina Shands says
June 26, 2010 at 10:09 amOnly you can go out on the lake for a relaxing afternoon and discover something that can have a huge impact on the lives of others. Great analogy. Love the photos. I am going to find a nice, quiet and cool place to sit and answer those questions.
suepainter says
June 26, 2010 at 10:25 am🙂 Thanks, Kristina. Let me know your answers.
Sue
Sandy Rees says
June 25, 2010 at 5:36 pmGreat food for thought! I think you’re so right that our businesses and ourselves are tightly intertwined.
Sandy
Lisa Scott says
June 25, 2010 at 8:40 amSo true, Sue! And what a great exercise. Someone took me through a very similar thought process several months ago, and the result was a complete transformation in what I believed was possible with my business. Thanks so much for sharing this life- changing exercise!
Julie Hawkins says
June 23, 2010 at 12:01 pmSue, I’m a big fan of metaphors and loved yours! Anything nature or animal “gets me.”
This information is so timely. I just ran a one day workshop a few weeks ago and did a similar exercise where I was the demo subject. We used similar questions and the results were amazing. Thanks for reminding us of this.
Julie Hawkins
suepainter says
June 23, 2010 at 2:48 pmYou’re welcome, Julie. Like you, anything animal or natural seems to speak to me.
Sue Painter
Terri Brooks says
June 23, 2010 at 9:37 amThanks, Sue for the great article. I can definitely relate to the fear of seeking our uniqueness and stretching to grow no matter our circumstances.
Sometimes it’s the hardest to see our own uniqueness because we are in the middle of the forest.
So thanks for helping me to see that I need to move out of the crowded forest to shine and grow as only I can.
Terri 🙂
Mitch Tublin says
June 22, 2010 at 10:04 pmSue,
Great photo and I enjoyed how you introduced your topic and story with it. Fine work here.
Mitch
Jeff Brunson says
June 22, 2010 at 7:59 pmLove the pic of the cedar. It is amazing how much of my 9 years in business for myself that I’ve spent becoming comfortable with ‘the lean’ … and learning not to see it as something wrong – abnormal – but the way it should be.
A client of mine in Chicago sent me a message from Brian Whetten today. Here is an excerpt from that message:
“Being successful as a coach, counselor, healer, or other type of purpose driven practice builder requires learning a new, different, more caring way of doing business. It requires letting go much of what we think we know about business, or how we think business “should” be, and learning what it means to do business in a way that works for us, both practically and energetically.”
Phil Dyer says
June 21, 2010 at 8:17 pmSue – I really like the exercise! I might have to borrow that (with attribution, of course). The “What’s the Worst Thing That Can Happen” question is one of my favorites!
Best,
Phil
suepainter says
June 21, 2010 at 9:04 pmYou are certainly welcome to use it, Phil. I got that from one of my own spiritual teachers many years ago. (Ram Dass).
Sue P.
Linda Pucci says
June 21, 2010 at 6:48 amI love this, Sue! And your exercise/questions to combat the fear are spot on. Thanks for the reminder to allow our uniqueness to find the place to grow in our own way. Too often I think entrepreneurs (myself included) get caught up in believing there’s some magic way to do things, and in buying into that, we lose sight of our own special and unique gifts. I’m going to pass this one along!
suepainter says
June 21, 2010 at 7:34 amThanks, Linda!
Katherine C. H. E. says
June 20, 2010 at 7:16 pmWOW, Sue! I love that living metaphor that tree provides. How beautiful and powerful! Thank you for sharing it. What a clear visual. I know I’ll remember and continue to be inspired by your Seeking Cedar for years to come! XO, Katherine.
Life Blossoming Systems
suepainter says
June 20, 2010 at 7:54 pmThanks, Katherine. Come to visit and I’ll float you over there to see it. 🙂
Sue P.
Terry Monaghan says
June 20, 2010 at 4:53 pmSue – what a great visual! Seems to me that growing or withering is really up to us. So, Grow Baby Grow!
Pinky McKay says
June 20, 2010 at 1:01 amThanks Sue for this lovely insight and the phrase “seeking Cedar”.
We can all choose to stretch further than we imagined possible.
The exercise is helpful too.
Pinky
linda Jones says
June 19, 2010 at 11:50 pmStretching out of comfort zones does impact our personal and business lives. Thank goodness we have our businesses to facilitate our growth, or life would get boring! Love the photo.
Linda
Get Clear Goals with Lynn Moore says
June 17, 2010 at 11:21 pmLove ‘Seeking Cedar’ Sue! What a great phrase. Don’t you just love it when the Universe provides all this inspiration around us and we actually recognize it as such? Thanks for a great article.
Lynn
Laura Hollick says
June 17, 2010 at 7:30 pmlove the visual with this article, that illustrates perfectly what it can feel like sometimes when you are stretching out of your comfort zone into a grander version of yourself.
It also shows how flexible we need to be become when we make the decision to go for our dreams!
Lisa Manyon says
June 16, 2010 at 8:36 amSue,
I love this and how you and Bill coined the resilient tree as “seeking cedar”. I think the word ‘seek’ is vital toy your message. Often people give up on dreams and goals because they don’t see an easy path to get there and choose not to seek alternative routes and solutions to achieve goals.
Great info.
Write on!~
Lisa
suepainter says
June 16, 2010 at 1:04 pmThanks, Lisa. Yes, I often see that people will work toward a goal so long as the path is straight. But, of course, it never is. Taking the bends is necessary to reach the goal.
Sue P.