It’s funny how people close to you will doubt what you are doing and if it makes sense. Why is that? Is it because they are afraid of failure? Is there such a thing as failure? Why does our culture believe it’s OK to succeed but not to fail? Haven’t most successful people failed at something???? Isn’t that part of success? Everyone wants me to stay in my previous work because I was successful in it……it was really the opportunities that I had and the people who surrounded me at the time. It’s a different time and place now, and I don’t want to do that anymore.
You are quite perceptive and right to ask those questions. Here’s my answer to you, sir, and it’s a little bit long. People doubt what you are doing because, as you correctly stated, the people you love who are close to you are afraid of failure…and they project their own fear onto you. So, they can drop feeling fearful for themselves and feel it for someone else. That’s a whole lot easier for most people to live with.
Also, sometimes, people do not want to be around someone who fails because it brings their fear about their own life to the forefront – so they try to get you to do anything and everything ‘safe’ so that (unconsciously) they do not have to face their own fears.
Here’s the deal about failure….almost all millionaires have failed a zillion times before they’ve made it big. There actually IS no failure, only feedback. You already know this, you said it to me when you reported on your first try at your new business. You said then, “I didn’t sell anything, but I learned a whole lot and make good contacts.” You turned what your lovers would call “failure” into feedback.
To me, the only “failure” is when people get feedback and then never act on it, curling up into a little ball and saying “I tried something ONE BIG TIME and it didn’t work, and woe is me, I cannot even dare to think about trying it again a little differently.” That, to me, is abject failure. Abject failure’s cousin is stupidity. Stupidity is doing the same thing, and getting the same feedback over and over again, and never changing what you are doing but still expecting the result to be different.
You could be “successful” in your previous work because the timing was right and you were challenged and interested in doing it. That was then. It may come around again, who knows? But right now, your vision for yourself is for this new business. So let your lovers keep their fear to themselves, and you stay true to your own vision.
That’s my answer to my reader. But this comes up, frequently, for small business owners who are already in business, much less for those new to being self-employed. You can get help from my e-book How To Get Support For Your Business from Your Spouse, Family, and Friends. It answers the fear question, and more! Check it out here.